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Active Listening

	LISTEN You may be tempted to “fix” the problem, but the person you are with needs you to hear what they are saying.

	PARAPHRASE Try to paraphrase what you heard to make sure you understood and to show that you are paying attention.

	DON’T JUDGE Your goal is to understand and to support, not to provide your opinions or perspectives.

	SHOW EMPATHY Consider the person’s feelings and put yourself in their shoes. Validate their feelings.

	EVALUATE After listening to the person, allow a moment to pause and evaluate the conversation.

	TAKE YOUR TIME To be sure that you understand what is needed, wait until after the person has finished speaking before offering any feedback or advice.

	ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS Ask questions that respectfully encourage the person to share information that will be helpful for you as a helper.

	USE BODY LANGUAGE Face the other person, nod, and have an open and relaxed body position to show that you are engaged and interested.

TIPS TO HELP SHOW THAT YOU CARE AND CREATE EMOTIONAL SAFETY

Respect boundaries and consent

Boundaries can be physical, sexual, intellectual, emotional, or financial.

Do it, don’t just say it

Actions speak louder than words.

Share your calm, and refuse to bring elevated emotions or arguments

If you find yourself feeling wound up, tell the person you need a break.

Appreciate the person

Tell the person that you appreciate them, and thank them for sharing with you.

Practice Transparency

Be honest with people, and tell them if you are struggling with something, too.

Practice Active Listening and be aware of your body language

Being present and available is crucial.